Just days ago, I returned from being part of an all-female team, serving global women who in turn, dedicate their lives to the lost and forgotten of the world. Experience says that all that estrogen in one setting is a recipe for tension but as I have experienced with this group before, when team is done well, it is a beautiful thing.
We have all been raised on the mantra that there is no “I” in TEAM. Technically and grammatically speaking, this is obviously correct. However, as one who works in and with teams, I have come to realize that most dysfunction occurs when individuals within a team feel misunderstood, unappreciated or ignored for their individual contribution. This can be applied to a team as small as a nuclear family and to a team of 36 women who join together for a 10 day project half way around the world.
1 Peter 4:10-11 says that God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. The text reminds us to use them well to serve one another.
If you are in a situation where your gifts are not being utilized or the gifts of others do not allow you to contribute effectively, there might be a need for some adjustment of roles! This also applies to family life where it takes work to bring out the best in each member.
The key to harmony in a team is not that we give up ourselves but that we realize that we need to channel all of our good stuff into supporting the group. This may require that we step back on occasion and let someone else show off their uniqueness or pick up some slack so that another team member gets a moment to shine. But for a team to be awesome, those with individual gifting need to feel free to use that gifting freely and at times, with abandon.
Most of my life, I have volunteered and served where I was needed. Quite honestly though, not all that volunteer service has utilized my strengths. For example, that church nursery was not the place for me. Let’s just say that I do not rock it when changing other people’s children’s diapers or swaying them to sleep. If I am honest, I am not really a baby person unless they are somehow related to me. And as far as serving the world, I am not the girl you want on the house or water well building team. I have a leaky kitchen faucet that we have to fix on a regular basis. Me building your house would not be a gift. But when I serve as a counselor to people struggling in their marriages, trying to better team dynamic or understand addiction, the service is an absolute joy and I am more effective.
When families come for counseling or a team leader is struggling with “inner office turmoil” and wants some quick fixes, one of the first thing that I will look for is the identification of roles and the personal satisfaction of individuals in their role. Literally, there are times when switching the daily chores up is enough for family members to feel more appreciated for their uniqueness, which leads to better communication and teamwork. Other times, a family member has never been comfortable in their role as the peacemaker, the scapegoat or the clown and desperately wants their script to change. It isn’t always easy to change the role you have had for what seems like forever, but changing the role could move your family or team from average to amazing…might be worth the effort.
As I reflect on my time serving with the women of Thrive Ministries, I feel fortunate to have experienced teamwork where unbelievably talented, smart and compassionate women joined forces to bring their unique gifts to other equally talented, smart and compassionate women who needed encouragement. Team done well is indeed a beautiful thing.
Sonia
[email protected]720.449.2235
@soniaknelson